he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
