I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize
