I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
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