Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Randomize
