I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
