he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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