ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
