Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
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