If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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