Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
