life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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