So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Randomize
