I cannot find my penis.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Randomize
