just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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