he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Randomize
