I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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