Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
