Midget sex pt 2 tonight
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
