I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
