Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize
