who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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