i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
