is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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