I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
