Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
i wish my penis had a tongue
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
