I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
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