So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Randomize