need another drink. this is the easiest way
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
I will be naked everywhere
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Randomize