what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
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