hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Cover your peen. We're going out.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
