i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
