happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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