So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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