You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Randomize
