I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Randomize
