youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Randomize
