Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
she looked like the before picture.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Randomize
