How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
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