I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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