its not stalking. its research.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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