but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
All I want is dick and wine.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
