she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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