Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
