Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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