She's JV to your varsity
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Randomize
