Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
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