I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
