i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
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