doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
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