Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
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